Menu Plan Monday May 11-17

I am feeling really run down today. While I was able to sleep in a bit and had a nap yesterday, I am still feeling very lethargic. Sweet Ivy had Daddy's help to make a pretty bead necklace for me for mother's day. We had a lovely breakfast at a local diner, got Raising Canes for lunch for free, and then I made fried shrimp for dinner. Yum!

Sunday - Fried shrimp & corn on the cob
Monday - Nachos or Tacos
Tuesday - Breakfast
Wednesday - Pork chops and rice pilaf
Thursday - leftovers
Friday - Appetizers
Saturday - Parmesan crusted tilapia & couscous

Compared to my: Month of May Menu

Menu Plan Monday @ Orgjunkie.com

Strawberries

My strawberry bush had a few berries ready at the same time instead of one every day. Yum!

Wordless Wednesday: Aquarium Fun

Two Things Tuesday

1. We have a robin's nest in our patio. We have watched her build her nest and feed her young birds. This week, the babies are learning to fly!  It has been neat to watch and show Ivy up close. 

2. Health. It's been bad in our house! Personally, I've been eating larger amounts of food and snacking more than I should. I have been making an effort to eat more fruits and vegetables. Ryan is interested in the Couch-to-5K program. We got out and walked as a family today. Hopefully we can start getting ourselves healthier. My back doesn't hurt so I want to move! 

Menu Plan Monday

This week has two "events". The first is Cinco de Mayo. We normally don't do anything for this but I thought a simple regular menu item would be appropriate for this day - nachos. Yeah, go ahead and laugh. The other event is teacher appreciation week.  I'm not sure how I feel about it. It doesn't really do anything for our menu.

So straying ever so slightly from my Month of May Menu:

Sunday: Grilled hamburgers - BOGO sale on hamburger patties

Monday: Nachos with homemade guacamole. I sauté my chicken with cumin and coriander to give it the Latin flavor.

Tuesday: Chicken salad sandwiches made from a rotisserie chicken

Wednesday: Pork chops and potatoes (packs of pork chops were a BOGO last week)

Thursday: Pizza - and hopefully we will make some extra dough for the freezer 

Friday: Pan grilled tilapia and rice pilaf

Saturday: Crock pot tangy meatballs 

More Menu Plans at OrgJunkie.com

A Little Adventure

On Monday, Ivy and I both woke up feeling horrible so we both stayed home. She spent most of her day laying on the couch in various stated of consciousness. Tuesday, I stayed home with her to make sure she was better. She and I were both pretty antsy so we got dressed and headed out the door!

I gave her the lead and let her direct my driving - left, right, straight. We first ended up at Sonic and we got something to drink. Second, we drove all the way across town to a bluebonnet field. Their peak of the season was the week before but I wanted to see them anyway.

I love bluebonnets! 

After that, it was time for lunch.

She got a silly game with her meal. I interpreted it as an in ca r game of "I Spy" or a type of scavenger hunt. We kept driving around town to see if we could find things on the cards. 

We ended up at a local farm that is home to a fall pumpkin patch. Behind the farm, we found a pasture with three horses in it. We stopped to just stand on the fence and observe them. They're horses. I started clicking my tongue. They all came to visit with us.

We had fun.

Freezer Meals part 2

I spent about an hour preparing 4 freezer meals - two each of chicken teriyaki and cilantro lime chicken. We ate one of the teriyaki chickens this evening. 

I left the chicken breast whole because it was going to be a long day. I also cooked it on low in the crockpot. Ryan made rice to go along with it while I was running an errand. Everything was pretty easy.  Once the rice was ready, I shredded the chicken and we ate this easy meal.

Even though the meal was still frozen when put into the crockpot and the chicken was left whole for timing purposes, it was still pretty dry. I'm not too thrilled with the outcome. We will finish eating the leftovers and will eat the second meal of this. But if I decide to make this again, I will use a different version and make a few tweaks with my ingredients.

The other freezer meal I prepared was a hit. I spent some time on a sick day (Ivy) to make breakfast burritos. I made bacon, roasted potatoes and scrambled eggs. I ate one fresh and loved it. The only downside with the frozen version, the reheating directions are horrible. I don't know how long I tried to heat up my burrito and it was still cold. But it did taste yummy. Maybe next time I will use more bacon and cheese. Easy breakfast for the win!

Breakfast burritos - http://www.momontimeout.com/2011/08/breakfast-burrito-bonanza/

Chicken teriyaki - http://www.stockpilingmoms.com/2014/02/crockpot-teriyaki-chicken/

Menu for the Month of May

I saw a website from Pinterest and I decided to plan out all of the menus for the month of May!

1: crockpot teriyaki chicken

2: leftovers

3: gnocchi with pink sauce (tomato sauce with cream)

4: leftovers

5: chicken salad sandwiches (using rotisserie chicken)

6: nachos

7: pork chops and potatoes

8: pizza

9: pan grilled tilapia and rice pilaf 

10: crock pot tangy meatballs

11: shrimp fettuccine (Pinterest)

12: leftovers

13: tacos

14: crockpot beef stew

15: leftovers

16: appetizers

17: Parmesan tilapia and couscous

18: hamburgers

19: leftovers

20: breakfast

21: chicken and rice (freeze)

22: leftovers

23: fish and chips

24: 3 cheese chicken fettuccine Alfredo bake (double to freeze)

25: leftovers

26: French dip sandwiches (crock pot)

27: million dollar spaghetti (freeze)

28: broccoli cheese soup (freeze)

29: leftovers

30: chicken nuggets (freeze)

31: fried catfish

I'm sure some of this will change. We need to eat a bunch of what we have in the freezer before I can do some more meaningful freezer meals. I am also not accounting for weekends when I might make a lunch. I'm also not accounting for the fact that I will be taking leftovers for lunch so there may be less leftovers.

Freezer Meals, part 1

If you follow my boards on Pinterest, you would know I've been pinning a lot of inspiration for freezer meals. I've decided to start trying that out. I thought about easing myself into it and only putting the meals together as I make one and save a second portion, but I think I will do two dinner recipes and two breakfast recipes in one day. I may even ask Ryan to make his awesome pizza dough to freeze. We have been kindof burned out and bored with what we have been eating lately - even though I've noticed my tastes have been expanding. Also, the warmer months are around the corner. Crock pot meals are awesome for summer because we won't be slaving over a hot stove. This will give us more free time too - instead of the whole cooking process, we will be waiting on the food to cook and actually doing stuff in that time.

Speaking of meals, we have been making it a point to sit together for the majority of our meals. During the week, we are a bit more relaxed for breakfast. This is helping to teach Ivy to slow down, focus on togetherness and to learn appropriate manners, especially if we are eating out.

We have to use what's in the freezer so space can be freed up for these freezer meals. If I get some fresh yogurt, I can make some berry/fruit yogurt freezes to make morning smoothies. I know I have to get some supplies too and our grocery bill may be more expensive at the forefront of this all. Cross your fingers. I want this to work!

Here are some recipes I will be making. No casseroles yet or any quick makes but those are being planned. They're all from Pinterest but I will try to link them up when I have an actual computer in front of me. 

Breakfast burritos (http://www.momontimeout.com/2011/08/breakfast-burrito-bonanza/)

Crockpot cilantro lime chicken

2 chicken breasts

1 bunch fresh cilantro, chopped

1 red onion, chopped

1 can black beans, drained, rinsed

2 cups corn

2 tsp garlic, minced

1 tsp cumin

Juice from 2 limes

Place all ingredients in freezer bag. Freeze flat.

For cooking:Thaw overnight in fridge.

Cook in crockpot on low 8 hours (high 4 hours)

Shred chicken and stir mixture together.

Serve with tortillas, shredded cheese & sour cream

Crockpot Chicken Teriyaki

1 cup pineapple juice

½ cup packed brown sugar

⅓ cup soy sauce

2 lbs boneless, skinless chicken, cubed

Place all ingredients in crockpot and stir. Cook on low 4-6 hours. Serve over rice.

Leave chicken whole to cook longer (6-8 hours)

Strawberry Chocolate Chip Scones

Ingredients:

1 1/2 Cups All purpose organic flour

2 Tablespoons sugar or sucanat

2 1/4 teaspoons baking powder

¼ teaspoon baking soda

½ teaspoon salt

6 Tablespoons butter, preferably organic

1 large egg yolk

½ cup buttermilk, organic (or homemade* see bottom)

½ cup strawberries, organic

½ cup chocolate chips

½ cup almonds chopped (optional)

Directions:

1)   Preheat oven to 425 and cover a baking sheet with parchment paper

2)   In a large bowl sift together all of the dry ingredients. Cut in butter with a pastry blender, until it resembles a coarse meal.

3)  In a smaller bowl whisk together egg yolk and buttermilk. Add wet ingredients into dry ingredients and stir until dough starts to pull together.

4)   Fold in chocolate chips and strawberries and roll out onto a floured surface.

5)   Pat dough into a large square and cut into squares again, then triangles

6)   Place on cookie sheet and place in oven and bake for 12-15 minutes

7)   Once cooled place in sandwich bags, or all in gallon bag.

8)   To serve: Reheat in microwave or toaster oven.

Freezing Directions:

Once cooled place in sandwich bags, or all in one gallon bag, remove air, and freeze. To serve: Reheat in microwave or toaster oven.

Easter post 1

One of those city sponsored Easter activity events.

She sure loves characters!

Plus one non-Easter character...

Spring!

I had a post started but it got eaten.

This is another random stream of consciousness. Well, just about birds this time.

When I was pregnant or Ivy was an infant, we had two hummingbird feeders right out our living room door. They were sliding glass doors and we kept the blinds open quite often. I regularly had 4 hummingbirds visiting my feeders. We also had a swallow nest right out of our front door.

Once we moved into the house, I knew I wanted to have birds galore! Hummingbird 'season' was kinda over so I didn't buy any new feeders for them. But we've always had regular bird feeders. Since spring started, we have had the regular feeders back out and I bought a hummingbird feeder. I finally made some nectar and hung it over the weekend. Within 24 hours, we had a visitor!

Other birds that we have that are pretty standard are the various chickadees, sparrows, and the like, doves, a pair of cardinals, and now the humming bird and a robin! The robin has made a nest right at the top of one of the patio roof posts. We have three bird houses that the smaller birds are using. I want more birds! I want blue jays! I want the mockingbirds that nest nearby to visit!

It sure is nice being able to see all the different varieties and listening to their songs.

Just some random things

I've had injections into my back twice already. It's a dextrose and pitcher plant chemical. It's a natural alternative and if I have this right, the body is supposed to work with it to help heal itself. It has made such a difference. It's strange being pain free. Now, honestly I'm feeling pain lately. I hope it's only situational. I have one more round and I hope it takes care of everything. Being pain free has improved my mood. Even the kids have noticed. I'm smiling, laughing, and playing with Ivy more. 

Gardening is making me happy too. We got and planted two blackberry bushes and a strawberry bush. We have already enjoyed a few of the strawberries. The blackberries have been flowering but are just now about to fruit. We've also finally cleaned up the yard of trimmings and started a compost. The last yard project is to move the bed from the tree in the front to the mail box. 

In general, I have been feeling very productive. I was able to finish off my lesson plans for the year. What really helped was having a full plan. Now my challenge will be to stay current on grading. 

Backstreet's Back! Not really - it's just about my Back

The battle of my backs is becoming a war.

Since 2003 I have been having back problems. I remember days in college classes that I would be laying on the floor with my feet in a chair to alleviate pain while also passed nearly out on Vicodin. I went to the back pain center and had physical therapies. It didn't work. So like a lot of doctors are want to do, I was put on a prescription painkiller.

We moved to the DFW area and I sought help from a new doctor. An ER visit, a series of office visits and one x-Ray later, I was diagnosed with scoliosis and prescribed physical therapy. We moved again. Another doctor, another round of medication. Plus a heel insert to help straighten things out. Another move, another ER visit and I'm seeing the original doctor that diagnosed me. My back pain got progressively worse over time.

Ryan had enough and so had I. He got a recommendation for a chiropractor from one of his coworkers and I have been seeing him since mid February. He has not only adjusted my back but discovered that I do not have scoliosis. He also put me on a topical cream for pain which is helping a bit. He suggested  an MRI to see but it is expensive so it has to wait. In the mean time, I'm starting these injections. It's more involved but I'm getting some kind of price cut or something to eat up my insurance deductible so I can start reaping the benefits of a copay.

And today, even though it is the same day as the procedure, I have been unaware of my back. The pain level is way down and I cannot be happier. They asked where the pain was, we pinpointed it and they injected a dextrose concoction into those areas and then adjusted my back on a more intense level.

So, *cussword* you, back!

The dog is licking and I cannot stand the noise.

My back is stupid. 

Stream of thoughts and... Go.

I hate that I procrastinate. I have an idea but then I only go half-assed. I purchase things, make plans and then I don't follow through with them. For instance... I want to get fit. Everyone has this ideal for themselves  about what they want to look like or whatever. I got my bike. I need to ride more. I'm interested in yoga. I got a mat and a couple of starter DVDs and I would like to take classes. Have I followed through? Nope. I hate me for this. I know I would mentally and physically benefit from exercise. Something happens. I get sick. My body hurts. I'm busy with work. I gotta do this. I have to take care of that. I slice my thumb open. Questions questions... Is my body/mind creating these problems to terminate supposed plans? Is it depression that rules this? 

Back to my back... I've been going to a chiropractor to see about my back issues. An X-ray revealed that I do not have a case of scoliosis. Misdiagnosis! Great. Now why, if I'm not overly or stupidly too active, does my back go into random spasms? Is this the mind/body (dis)connect doing its tricks again? So I've been having adjustments which help a bit and I'm trying different therapies to see if we can knock this garbage out. I shouldn't be in this much pain for nothing. Looking at an MRI and some injections.

Whoo boy.

Spoons

There's something called the spoon theory. It gives people an idea how people suffering with lupus spend their time. The spoons represent choices to be made. You only have so many choices you can make - only so many spoons to spend. 

I have spoons. I don't know how many spoons I have. Shame. But once my spoons are gone, I start to shut down or I cry or I lash out. I want to throw my spoons and give up. Sometimes I want to gingerly lay my spoons down and silently walk away. A lot of days, those spoons need straightening, organizing, shining, reordering, and straightening again before I can spend them. 

Today, I am tired. Standing exhausts me. Getting out of bed is physically draining. Somehow, I manage to work through the day. Spoons. 

Truth

Oh Shit. Another one of THOSE people. I'm writing this to catalogue things, to sort shit out, to fix whatever the hell is wrong. Even within my own perspective, I know my life is a walk in the park. My husband is supportive and loving. My child is smart, entertaining, and very well-behaved. We have meals in our stomaches, a roof over our heads, and clothes on our backs. no room to complain. you see there is a stigma about this. there's a whole 'just get over it' attitude. i'd love to. i'd so fucking love to. here's the deal... no can do.

So the question is "Why?" Why the hell am I not happy? Why the hell do I always think of killing myself? Why the hell can't I feel as though I am worthwhile? Nope. Not going to sugar coat this. even I don't know.

Whine whine pity me poor me pay attention to me

who the fuck is going to care Why would anyone want to read any of this junk.

why isn't my medication working

why don't i go to therapy. because I can't afford it (time or money)

just get over it just get over it just get over it just get over it

i can't

calm down calm down calm down calm down

this is me calm you don't want to see me blow up

it's time people really saw or experienced what it's like in my head

i love it when my child comes and hugs me.

whispers hey mom... i love you.

why isn't it enough?

i'm nobody. nobody cares. i hardly care.

my back hurts why won't my back stop hurting

i wish i could sleep for days for weeks for months

i see the damned light at the end of this stupid twisted tunnel and it's where i want to be but there are these obstacles. 

i am afraid

i don't understand any of this crap.

run through the motions of daily life

i don't even want to participate in the good things

what set me off today? i woke up.

Welcome. Welcome to my brain. 

on bad days i want to stay curled up in there in the dark.

so this is the start of a stupid journey

i'm going to therapy myself.

Meow

I was working in the graduate studies office as a student aide at the local university I was studying at. It was a moist and muggy day and someone came into the office saying that a kitten wandered into the building.

I went investigating and decided then and there that I would take him home. Since I was still at work, I took him to a lady that was in another office. She was stocked with cat care items because she was the faculty advisor for the campus animals. 

I surprised my husband with our new addition. I had called his mom about the situation and she laughed. Ryan was okay with it all. 

He went through several names before we found one that suited him. We were really into the movie The Count of Monte Cristo, especially the supporting character, Jacopo ("Yah-kuh-poe"). We call him derrivatives of that name. Jacers, Jacy, Popo. When Ivy was younger, she called him Paco. 

This cat has a horrible habit of urinating in inconvenient places - like on the stove and on cookware. He even goes in bathtubs. He also waits at every door to make his escape. He was waking us up at all hours with weird yowling. 

When Ivy was born, we asked Ryan's parents to keep him for a while. I honestly didn't want him back because he was ruining things. We were living in apartments and really lost him a few times. 

Once we settled into our house this past summer, we reclaimed Jacopo. I think he and I finally bonded. Practically every time I sit down, he wants to be in my lap. Most times I oblige because he is warm. He still wants outside, but now he has a safe and contained outside (back yard) that he can explore. 

My Dad

I have been thinking about my dad recently. I think it has to do with my bike. Hey! I got a bike!

First story. I have hade 4 bikes in my life. The one I had training wheels on and learn to ride. I think that one was red. After I grew out of my trainer bike, I got a big girl bike with a banana seat that I rode throughout my remaining elementary years into middle school. I also had a white plastic basket on it.

(This is not a picture of my bike, but it was the bike I had - A Dream Girl by Huffy, I think.)

Then I asked for a 10-speed for a long time. I think it was Chistmas of 1992 or 3 that I finally got it. A generic red 10-speed with a white comfort seat. I was in love with those curved handlebars and I wanted a more grown up bike.

It was around this time when the first story of my dad comes up. One Saturday morning/afternoon, he and I went bike riding throughout our entire town. I don't know how long we were on the roads, but it was great. When we made out way home, we stopped at a convenience store located on the street of our neighborhood. He got us both sodas and we sat on the bench at the store and drank our Cokes.

I wish I had more stories like this.

Back to the bikes. One day I was riding around town with my brother and a couple of his friends. We rode across some railroad tracks which bent my front wheel. I stopped riding that bike. We inhereted two vintage cruiser bikes from my grandfather which my dad cleaned up and repainted. I started riding the cruiser and that was the start of my love affair with vintage and vintage-styled bicycles.

Boyfriends, jobs and cars stopped the bike riding. I never rode a bike again. It wasn't until I was 27 that I wanted a bike again. I specifically wanted a blue beach comber or a cruiser bike. It had been on my wish list ever since. After years of promises and frustrations and hunting down The Bike, I finally got myself a bike.

A student gave me a gift card as a late Christmas present. So very sweet! I picked out a bike, ordered it and my sweet husband put it together for me. The next day I picked up a tire pump and was finally able to ride my shiny, new, bike. 

The proverbial "They" say you never forget how to ride a bike. This is obviously one of life's lies. I barely went 30 yards before being scared while making a turn and plummeted arm first into a neighbor's mailbox. 

Brain:"Turn!!!" 

Arms/hands: "You idiot! We don't know how!" 

Feet: "We got this! We won't let ya fall all the way!"

Ivy was running the sidewalk with me and cried when I crash-landed into the mailbox. And she wanted to ride with me. The logical solution for us was to get a kid seat - I'm terrified that I will crash and fall again with the additional weight of Ivy when I'm still not very confident of my own balance and weight on the bike.

We will just have to wait and see. Additional note, I picked up a wicker basket for the front.

So I said I had been thinking of my dad. I have another story that in no way related to the bikes. When I was a teenager, my dad would come home from work with treats for us all - whatever we wanted. Our favorite sodas or candy. He would do this every evening without fail. And I just remembered... He used to sit outside on the front porch all the time (he still does) and I would sit out front with him. We didn't really talk much, I mostly read trashy romance novels.  

Cal's second week of adventures

Cal is going with Ivy to visit her grandparents a week before Dad and I join her. I am hoping the magic will continue and that someone documents it for me. I want to continue to share Cal's adventures. 

Motivation & Menu Plan Monday

I took a hiatus from blogging because of schedule and time adjustments (went back to work and dealing with the house purchase). Then I got sick which was nothing in itself, but it added stress. Also, there was work stress. Then a couple weeks flew by and turned into months of not really posting any content anywhere.

I got comfortable being off the grid. I was in the moment. I liked living in the present, not behind the lens or in the glow of a screen. I kept going to post, but it felt meaningless. Who wants to read my purposeless ramblings? No one, that's who. So I stayed quiet. I also lost interest. Getting back online, I hesitate.

I hesitate because it isnt important enough or helpful to the world. I hesitate because being mostly silent on the internet is a hard habit to break, though not unwelcome. I hesitate because once it is out there, it is out there forever. I hesitate because of how it might be interpreted - as a pity-seeking, attention-begging, drama-llama cry for help. I hesitate because someone somewhere else has it worse than me how-dare-I-even-mention-my-problems. I hesitate because noone wants to read that. I hesitate because that is all there is.

I would retreat from it all. Shut it all down. Never look back. Return to how things were. To The Before. But it is how I stay connected with family. It is how I stay connected with friends. It is how I stay connected to reality. And right now, I feel as though i am pulling back from reality. I can sense my Self wanting to retreat into the back corners of my mind. 

I mentally took a slight nosedive. I felt worse every day. So I chatted it up with my doctor and we increased my meds. Nature of the beast, I assume. I believe I have finally adjusted. I'm certainly not feeling disinterested in something that kept me occupied. I am feeling motivated. I want to do things, start projects, get back out there. So maybe I will.

Menu Plan Monday

Sunday - Seared pork loin & mashed potatoes

Monday - Leftovers

Tuesday - Black bean and chicken enchilada casserole (Pinterest)

Wednesday - Leftovers

Thursday - Pizza

Friday - Leftovers

Saturday - Unsure

Menu Plan Monday @ OrgJunkie